List of requirements

My presence in college will be so valuable that a PA will be required. :P Was asked by the powers that be to come up with a list of requirements for such a person. I wonder will I get away with putting down: Must do thesis of  40,000-45,000 words in the timeframe of two years. Probably not. It's odd writing such a list as I don't want to seem like a demanding doodaa but also worried that will forget to put down something that may be of high importance  in months to come. This experience does bring to mind the list of requirements that the kids in the film Mary Poppins compile in their search for the perfect Nanny:

If you want this choice position
Have a cheery disposition
Rosy cheeks, no warts
Play games, all sorts

You must be kind, you must be witty
Very sweet and fairly pretty
Take us on outings, give us treats
Sing songs, bring sweets

Never be cross or cruel
Never give us castor oil or gruel
Love us as a son and daughter
And never smell of barley water

If you won't scold and dominate us
We will never give you cause to hate us
We won't hide your spectacles so you can't see
Put toads in your bed or pepper in your tea

Hurry, Nanny

Many thanks sincerely

Jane and Michael Banks